I am no longer sure that I know what love is. So far from me has it gone, comprehending the truth of it escapes me.
Due to its intangible nature, attempting to compare it to another’s experience has proven to be futile. Likewise, leaning on prior moments of being engulfed by this feeling to attain clarity have been met with similar results. I look to the Word for understanding; 1 Corinthians lends some insight. But this is a brotherly love, whose attributes should be conveyed by all for all. They are certainly applicable to romantic love and should be shown in earnest there as well. Still, what is that force which moves us from platonic to intimate?
At first glance (literally & figuratively), one would surmise that it is physical attraction which begins to cross that threshold. So often we take the pining over someone’s outward beauty as indication of some supernatural force drawing us toward them. How do we separate and verify that this rush of desire is more than sheer lust? Moving to the next layer, we look at the mind. Is there and intellectual attraction? Is there a subconscious connection and similar pattern of thinking; the likes of which leads us to believe that there is more at play than casual association? Not being able to distinguish this information from high quality, genuine friendships, we must again delve a bit deeper.
As we reach the heart, soul, and essence of an individual we begin to wonder if this is the source. Does this longing stem from a link that transcends all understanding? Or course we want to claim this answer; the truth. Because you don’t know, but you just know. Isn’t that the unanimous decision? That must be the conclusion of the matter since it is unexplainable. Forgive my skepticism, but let me ask you this: if a person hides their true nature, creating a façade or false image, did you love them? How is it possible to love someone that you did not know? Or did you simply love the idea of the person you thought they were and hoped they would become? Ergo, how can true love be built on deception? Logically, I know there is no logical explanation for these questions; as love itself is an illogical conception. I do not disbelieve its existence, nor do I wish to persuade anyone to question their own feelings. I am simply curious. Looking back at my own life, I wonder if I have ever known true love’s presence. Looking forward, I ponder on its ability to commune with me.